If you look in the rear-view mirror, is it possible to change anything you can see in it?
There is only one thing you can change – YOU. Who you see at the wheel can alter the future at any moment. Who you are and who you can become is fully within your control.
Doing-based Identity
People often navigate their lives by activity-based goals, situational desires, and trying to make things work. We may start out in life doing things and gaining skills because our parents encourage us, because we measure ourselves against goals our friends are pursuing, or because we think we can make a lot of money, or because society rewards activity, or insert a reason here.
We find ourselves chugging along on a doing track, and we let the things we are doing begin to define our identity. Our capability becomes limited by skills, lack of a skill or what we think we might not be able to do. We may even compare ourselves to others and the lives they are leading.
Wishing we didn’t have to do the same old day in the same old way, we may start hitting the snooze button. Instead of making some changes, we may let the fear of the unknown, self-doubt, circumstances or people from the past limit who we can become.
Confidence wholly based on skills – what we do – leaves us vulnerable to being shaken by external things we cannot control.
Being-based Development
Becoming your best you could start by asking yourself: “Who am I?” Try listing nouns and adjectives that describe WHO you are as a person. Then take those words and fill in “because of this I….” Think about who you are in life and how you show up with others. Now ask yourself “Why”?
Reflecting on these prompts could give you a place to begin discovering your Purpose, a journey that may require time and diving deeper and/or asking “why?” several times for various attributes.
Looking inside will also help you to become aware of gifts that come naturally to you, to understand who you are regarding other aspects yourself – strengths and limitations - and to become self-aware about how you impact the people around you.
When you understand your Purpose – the reason you are here for the benefit of others – you can get on a being-based development path. Be a person who feels successful and is successful before you do anything.
When you have the courage to become a better you, you will have greater success in all you want to do. Nobody can be a better you than you. You will naturally perform at higher levels, because you are being you and living out gifts that are unique to you.
As an internal north star, Purpose guides decisions rooted in who we are – and equally important - reminds us of who we are not. Purpose keeps us on a path where there is more success than failure and fulfillment in place of fear. Purpose fuels our ability to become the best versions of ourselves.
Our lives follow our thinking. Developing who you are is a dynamic, life-long journey. Where is your thinking leading you?
